So much that I didn’t seem to notice it has happened. So much life has been lived in these last several months that I am just now starting to catch my breath and realize that I’ve almost been in a daze watching it all go by. I’ve been in some sort of SO MUCH IS GOING ON coma watching my daughter, my husband, my friends, and my family figuring out their lives that I scarcely had time to notice what was going on with me own.
Everything. Everything and nothing all at once in a magnificent universe crushing hug.
I’ve gone through all the motions I’m used to. Gone to the same places, done the same things. Go to sleep, wake up and all the stuff in between because otherwise I would have gone into shock from all of the differences.
My friend Chad said something lovely, hilarious and too true when he met us in out hotel in California. As Mr. Kaos and I were making arrangements and scheduling our later day he watched us, the three of us as K was there too and said “The Kaos family isn’t very chaotic at all”.
I was dumbfounded for a moment. Was someone calling me organized?
ME? Me who is…. hey wait a minute…..
I am aren’t I? I always know what’s going on with every member of my household (granted there are only 3 of us) every moment of every day.
Which maybe makes me more of a control freak… but you have to be organized to be a control freak right?
I have become not so chaotic. I have become some what organized and some how strangely reliable.
It seems it wasn’t just this summer that has whipped by without my notice…
I went down the rabbit hole upside down 7 years ago and didn’t realize until very recently that I am right side up on the other side…