I’ve been hiding in a little box for over a year, tucked away from the outside world focusing on doing very few things, but doing them well. Getting my head together. Deciding what to do. Figuring shit out.
Do you know what I learned during all that quiet box dwelling figuring time? I mean aside from that I needed a mop and some hair dye (and peanut butter, duh). That I need to climb out of my quiet little hidey-hole and get with the program. I need to do some doing while I’m figuring out what to do. Big life changes, even when you are the one who instigated them, touch your entire life.
No shit, Sherlock. I know.
So what do I do? What am I doing? What the hell is going on with me? How am I going to pull this shit off? When is it all getting underway? Why am I asking these questions so loudly?
…did you read those loudly? because they are so loud in my head. echoing…
Because I’m trying to figure out who I want to be when I grow up. I’m looking for work after 10 years of being a stay at home parent and I don’t know what it is that I do. I know what I used to do. I know who I was then.
10 years ago. Then it was black and white. But then it was just me.
I’d like to make it as simple as that list I made for the store yesterday.
To be able to walk out into the world knowing what I need and how to get it. It isn’t. It won’t be. I’m doing it anyway.