I am blanketed in silence.
It isn’t that there’s no sound, that there’s nothing to hear. I look out over the dimly lit house and know that there should be house noises. The scuffle of my feet on the cold stone floor, the friction of my long white nightdress as it brushes against the sofa.
The sound isn’t gone… but my hearing is. I decline to be distressed by this and move on to other things. I can’t hear this world, but I can see it, in black and white with all the grays in between. My flesh is ashen in the dim light and just seeing its dull dead color sends a shiver up my spine. I look into the towering windows that line this room…
During the day this could be a glorious sun room. I wonder if my cat would find a sunbeam to curl up in. I wonder if I would. It’s night though, the very darkest night, and instead of the warming rays of some long forgotten sun I see my own reflection in the glass. The night sky has made it more of a mirror than a window and I can’t help but stare back into my pale blue eyes. Funny that they’re the only thing in this world that hold any color. My hair is black. My skin is gray. My lips like charcoal, but my eyes remain the same pale denim color that they are in life…
Suddenly the scene is too much. I can not stand the stone floor and the foreign sofas. I can not stand the mirrored windows and the suffocating silence.
With bare feet I run for the glass door and just as I grip its handle it shatters with all the windows around it following suit and I bleed.
Not red blood, blood the same charcoal gray as my lips.
I float above myself watching as the blue of my eyes, the only bit of color I had left, fades to gray.
I wonder if he didn’t have something different in mind, but when I read the question this dream, a reoccurring dream of mine since childhood, came to mind immediately.
If you’d like to answer this in a post on your own blog please link back to his Weekend Wandering post and leave him a comment to let him know. While you letting people know… leave me a comment to let me know as well… I’d love to see what you have to say.