take out…

Last night Mr. Kaos decided to come home a little early. To make things a little easier on me. To bribe me with Chinese take out.

That bribe? Always welcome here.

Since K was under the weather she had no desire to watch us enjoy our savory meal. She actually asked us not to eat it in front of her. Was she being a bit over dramatic? Perhaps, but given earlier events I had no desire to test that theory so we let it go. She ate her dinner of yogurt and crackers and then tottered off to lay in my bed and watch Curious George on TiVo.

At last she was out of the room. At last I could open the paper bag and expose the little white take out cartons that would surely give me great comfort and nutritious value (since I carefully order more healthful items from a restaurant that offers healthier options than we might find elsewhere)

With the bag open I carefully withdrew:

1/2 order Fried Prawns (OK they aren’t healthy at all)
Chicken Fried Rice (but this is done in a really healthy manner)
Mu Shu Chicken (and this is not saucy, made of chicken breast and fresh veggies)
Curry Vegetables (oh come on that’s just plain goodness)

My mouth was watering. My stomach was rumbling. I opened each container in turn, untied the bag that held the pancakes, took the lid off the plum sauce and proceeded to eat a fried shrimp.

Oh beautiful bad for me fried shrimp, oh how I love you. You’re so good. You’re so tasty. You’re so fried.

We really try not to eat a lot of fried food… but a woman can not live on steamed carrots alone right?

Okay I never eat steamed carrots but that’s neither here nor there, the point is even though it isn’t good for me it’s OK for me to eat a few fried shrimp every once in a while.

So I took half of the Shrimp from the carton and passed them to Mr. Kaos who took 2 shrimp out and handed the carton back to me “You have the rest babe” he said.

I considered this briefly. I looked into the package. I lusted. I longed. Then I passed it back to him and said “No, I already took half of them, you take the rest I don’t need them”.


I also considered this briefly. I thought to myself does he know what he just said and then I waited for it…

“Except that you’re the one that has to take meds for high blood pressure” he realized out loud.

I nodded. I smiled. I took ONE more shrimp.

I think he’s trying to kill me… with kindness.

14 thoughts on “take out…

  1. Martin Wehner says:

    steamed carrots, huh?you know who else likes carrots? bunnies do! now where did i put that kirchen whisk… :)

  2. Mr. Fabulous says:

    I like steamed carrots. I don’t like shrimp.There is a lesson in there somewhere but I will be damned if I know what it is.

  3. The Holmes says:

    Mmmm, nothing like a good reliable Chinese take out place. It’s always a joy to find one. My wife pulls a similar act sometimes. My absolute weakness is fried chicken, TOTALLY bad for you, hardly any redeeming nutritional value to offset the grease-laden, fat-drenched deliciousness. And there’s a really fantastic local fried chicken place right down the street that my wife suggests at least once a week, and I have to force myself to respond that we really shouldn’t…except sometimes we do. Life’s too short to go completely without fried food.

  4. holly says:

    my stomach just rumbled at the thought of fried shrimp. it’s not fair – it’s midnight here and i should be sleeping. instead i will dream. dream of the fried prawns. i mean shrimp. oops.

  5. CamiKaos says:

    travis: more for me.holls: When you come to visit I will give them to you.missb: yes… better for you both.tIM: Mine’s one of a kind… though people have asked if he would consider giving classes.123v: hell Mike and I almost make me wanna get married… Oh wait.. I already did that… but in truth I would do it all over again. and again. The marriage? has been so much more wonderful than the wedding.denise: mmmm. crab puffsholmes: luckily I am the only person in the house that likes fried chicken… but one of my best friends makes the best fried chicken EVER. So occasionally she takes pity on me and makes it for me.Mr. Fab: It’s that Fried shrimp are good and you don’t like them anyway?BW: Yes, my little house of love.Martin: Look out friend, I have fluorine gas and I’m not afraid to use it. xoStu: and I bet she’s enjoying that particular kind of death.

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