Yesterday I went upstairs to the kitchen to get dinner started only to find K (who is nearing 5) standing in the kitchen with a pen in one hand and a rolled up piece of paper in the other. She was heatedly talking at Mr. Kaos trying to get him to sign her contract… What on earth could the contract be for? hmmm…. She started in on me telling me how important it was that he and I sign… Mr. Kaos and I replied almost at the same time “Never sign a contract without having a lawyer look it over”
“I am a lawyer” she said.
“Well who drew up the contract?” I asked
“Billy did” she replied
at this point I will interject that “Billy” is her long time imaginary friend & brother… His name has been changed to protect the evil….
We still don’t know what Billy’s contract said… she wasn’t entirely clear on the situation either. She told me many different things that it said; it seemed to change each time we asked. Originally it was a contract promising to love each other… we told her we already had one of those.
This may seem benign but I assure you we have reasons for our suspicions… each time K comes up with a new inventive scheme to take over the world (okay our home) it is Billy who gives her the needed information… Honestly she will sometimes ask us questions and when we try to figure out where she even found out about the topic she will shrug and say “Billy told me”
So to sum up if your child ever brings you a contract from their imaginary friend, have your imaginary lawyer review it or you could be selling your soul for a lolly pop…
This was originally posted January 1, 2007