sharing 101…

I often get comments about how well K shares with others. Not just Mike and me, but other actual children… gasp. oh my. no, sharing…

Now I have no idea if this sharing takes place at school as well but here at home she does it extraordinarily well and without being asked… sometimes it becomes an issue, like when we are walking home from school and she is enjoying some tasty pretzels as she strolls… occasionally one of her little friends will eye the pretzels and she will offer them up much to the chagrin of his parents who quite understandably want him to go home and eat his lunch not K’s snack.

At the house it sometimes turns into what I like to call “commando sharing”. We haven’t had a problem with this in a few months but K sometimes thinks it is so much her duty to share with others that she becomes downright offended if they don’t accept her offer to share whatever toy she is playing with or flower she is smelling… I’ve heard the “I’m trying to share here!!!!” battle cry on more than one occasion.

Other types of sharing though are a problem. A mystery. Unknown and undesired… I have tried to explain this mystical form of sharing to K as I’m done with it sharing. She never wants to give away her toys. I tried to explain it as gift sharing too but she made it quite clear that if you give someone a gift you make it or buy it just for them… touche little monkey…

She’s very good at gift giving. It is a favorite practice of hers. At Christmas she loves to pick out toys for Toys For Tots or other toy giving organizations. She loves to make beautiful presents for her friends and family (she gets particularly excited to give gifts to her aunt and uncle as they always seem to appreciate her hand made treasures more than anyone else). Giving gifts is good… as long as the gift never belonged to her.

So my problem.. junk pile up. Even when she is done with a toy and will likely never ever play with it again in a million years she wants to keep it. Usually the reason is it’s for my memories… We try and try to explain but it’s in vain. Usually I wind up secretly ferreting out the toys that she hasn’t played with in so long I can’t even remember where she got them. Those I am able to spirit away to good will with no hassle… What about the larger things she couldn’t give a rats ass about until you try to give them away… Like oh say a “baby care center” or maybe a top of the line awesome tricycle she got from her godfather on her 2nd birthday… Nope, they aren’t going anywhere.

We’ve tried pressing the issue but it went no where. But when it came down to that trike Mike took it personally. Why? Not just because she has a bicycle and knows how to ride it… no… not at all. Why was it personal? It’s in his garage… don’t mess with my man and his garage. Not only can we park a jeep in our small single car garage but we can manage to edge around it, store household stuff, bikes, wagons, old strollers (that stroller has to go and Mr. VP if you are reading this… be on the look out for the stroller fairy) sports equipment, tiki junk and all manner of other manly things that are commonly or uncommonly stored in garages…

Mike pestered her for a good while about getting rid of her trike last year… I eventually asked him to stop and told him she would have to do it in her own time… I said someday she may surprise us and just say “Mother… Father… I am 32 now, have my own mansion, I have my own children… lets say we give that old trike to someone who needs it”

Sigh. dreams.

Except yesterday something even better happened… We were on our way home from yet another in a long sad line of consumer adventures (we were looking for a bench)… She was in the back seat next to Mike’s awesome super cheap new bicycle and our bags and bags of stuff we needed to have (and yes she was in her booster, half the back seat folds down independently) (and okay, we needed it all except that cute little clutch purse I just HAD to have). Anyway she looked up to us in the front seat, looked at the big smelly bike wheel next to her and said “Do we know any babies who would use my tricycle?”

*chirp chirp*


pretty much silence… I realized I should answer the question though as she named off a couple of little neighbor boys that already had a trike or were already past the trike stage…

We settled on a most worthy recipient… a good friend who is almost old enough for a big girl bike but not quite… and who is expecting any day now a little bundle of brotherly love… K was suddenly ecstatic… “Can T come over and get it???”

and so on this long weekend we learned that things really do sink into K’s beautiful thick little skull… I got a gorgeous new clutch… and Mike got an awesome new bike… Thank you Mr President…

One thought on “sharing 101…

  1. Bubblewench says:

    That is the sweetest thing. I truly believe that children do get it, but sometimes you need to give them time to do so. I’m so happy you give K that time. She seems to always come through in the end.

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