The past 18 months or so of my life have been a lot. Never mind any part that has anything to do with anything outside of my brain, body, and spirit. Reflecting on the me-ness of this past year and a half has been a lot. I think my childhood was about avoiding diagnosis and … Continue reading the diagnosis…
the fourth…
it was a long patriotic day of consuming movies and avoiding the heat. And now that I’m laying here typing from bed at a quarter til tomorrow listening to all the pops, crackles, and booms of neighborhood fireworks. Despite the fact that they’re not legal here. And we’re under a burn ban. And I’m cranky. … Continue reading the fourth…
sent outside…
an unlikely attempt…
It’s just after 9 pm on Monday. The first night of July. Which would obviously make this July 1. I’m sitting on the family room sectional having just filled out my little pink notebook for the day. “I’ve filled out the notebook for every day in July.” I joked. I’m very funny. That’s something you … Continue reading an unlikely attempt…
uniform for life…
When I was a teenager I totally identified as a goth. And it made sense. I was pale from hiding inside from the California sunshine, favored all-black clothes, and loved writing depressing poetry dripping with blood and tears. But the truth is, as I sit here evaluating all the little quirks and blips on my … Continue reading uniform for life…
whatevery-seven
It’s 12:57 am on Friday, March 8, 2024, and I’m sitting in bed. My partner is snoozing softly next to me. Our old cat is snore-purring at the foot of the bed. The stoic face of Keanu Reeves as Neo in The Matrix is on the TV screen. He’s just learned Kung Fu. Ordinarily, I … Continue reading whatevery-seven
strive for twice and sometimes settle for once…
It’s 1:32 in the afternoon and I’m sitting on my family room sectional. Spike is curled contentedly in my lap. A fly that was just buzzing around my head sits perched in a sunbeam on the back of the sectional. It’s twiddling its front two legs. If only I understood the fly sign language. I'm … Continue reading strive for twice and sometimes settle for once…
don’t stop me now…
I wasn't having a very good day on Friday. I don't think I was having a bad day, especially as compared with some others. But it wasn't a very good day. It was Friday morning and I was trying NOT to have the same roller coaster of feelings I'd had the day before. Thursday was … Continue reading don’t stop me now…
life in stereo…
It’s 8:59 pm and I’m sitting on the couch in the tv room. I’m not watching tv, I am listening to The Cure. I have it playing on the “upstairs” group so I can hear it as I wander through the rooms. It’s the kind of thing I’d dreamed of when I was a kid. … Continue reading life in stereo…
maximum effort…
It’s 1:58 pm and I’m on the sectional in our family room. I’ve been sitting here writing for about 30 minutes, but 5 minutes ago my cat came into the room. He took one look at me sitting here with my laptop coming up with words. Guiding them into sentences. Actually focused for the first … Continue reading maximum effort…
CamiKaos 