This is not the first note I’ve written to you today, dear laptop. Earlier I asked why you won’t add a period when I double space after a sentence. It’s not like I was holding you personally responsible. It’s not like I thought it was JUST you. It’s the entire computing industry. I’m just so used to that double space period when I type on my phone. It’s a feature of my mobile device that I find intuitive, helpful and charming.
Maybe I was a bit harsh when I asked you to be more like my smaller handheld computing device. Maybe I wasn’t thinking of your feelings. But to be fair, laptop, you’re a laptop. You’re not really supposed to have “feelings” per say. We’re not living in the movie Terminator. Or in Matrix. You machines haven’t taken over the world. Yet.
Now I know you’ve been fragile for a while. I know you’re on your last legs so to speak… but if you could just hold out a little longer? Instead of pulling the whack-a-doodle shit you were doing earlier today? Instead of heaving, chugging, running your fan at a high pitched whine and then shutting down for no good reason could you just, well I don’t know, not do all that stuff? Now is not a good time for you to die. Okay?
I’ll try to only say the nicest things. Really.
With love (and trepidation),
5 thoughts on “dear laptop…”
nigel may be able to help, he seems to be able to make macs live for longer than they (or we) want them to.
i’m not allowed to ask him for you :/ but if you ask him, he will…. probably. :)
Give that baby a good dusting, in all the right places…
Oh Sybil… I love how you make everything sound naughty.
Oh, I just had to buy a new laptop…it was a bittersweet moment. The bitter mostly involved my credit card bill…the sweet? New! laptop!
Ooer… it sounds like you could be talking to my laptop!