I've always had itchy skin. Sensitive skin. Problem skin. Whatever polite term the adults around me used, the reality was simple: I reacted to everything. Dryer sheets. Scented detergent. Some makeup made my eyes puff up. Perfumes that smelled terrible and made my arms and neck itch. The solution was also simple. Just avoid ever … Continue reading Was it Strawberries or Was it Stress?
Let’s talk about my face. Specifically, the one it makes when I’m not actively arranging it for the comfort of the general public. Apparently, that face says: “I’m mad.”“I’m tired.”“I’m annoyed.”“I’m such a bitch.” Here’s the thing: I’m not mad. I’m not tired. I’m not annoyed. (Okay, sometimes I’m annoyed, but usually at my email … Continue reading Masking Monday: The Face at Rest…
I spoke at an open source conference last week.For the first time since I left my old job.For the first time since the breakdown.For the first time since the diagnosis. I tried to follow the old, tried-and-true formula for writing a talk. The process that always worked before. It didn’t serve me. But it didn’t … Continue reading Masking Monday: Unscripted, Unmasked, Undone…
I’ve worn a version of myself like a costume for so long that I don’t always know who’s underneath it. Some days, I’m just a collection of practiced expressions.A carefully modulated tone.A perfectly timed laugh.A soft nod when I want to scream.A full human suit built to make sure you’re comfortable—no matter what it costs … Continue reading Masking Monday: What Is Masking, Really?
I had a conversation today with the good friend of a good friend—one of those generous, strategic humans who actually knows things about hiring and was kind enough to let me pick his brain. Because, yes, I need a job. And while we’re all supposed to pretend that’s a casual thing you manifest through vibes … Continue reading My Nervous System Has Notes…
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