There are times I do not want to be perceived. Whole stretches. Weeks when I am strictly available to my tiny family and no one else. I’ve always been like this: I withdraw, go hermit, disappear. In chat apps you can flip yourself to “away.” Your dot dims. People can still ping you, but the … Continue reading do not see me…
I started the morning with a video a friend sent me. In it, a guy was talking about his workout attitude. He had been all-or-nothing. If he couldn’t do it perfectly, he wouldn’t do it at all. That hit me. Hard. I’ve been circling around this idea for years: literal thinking, binary thinking, the trap … Continue reading No One Sees the Dial
I’m realizing only now, as I near 50, that I haven’t actually hated my hair my whole life. That sounds dramatic, so I should explain a little. I love my hair now. I really do. It’s crazy and wild and it doesn’t care what I want to do with it, it’s just going to be … Continue reading Masking Monday: Not Natural, But Real…
Manners matter. They did when I was seventeen and broke, working my very first job as a telemarketer… though the company dressed it up as “appointment setter.” I wasn’t closing sales, but I could calm nerves and soothe hurt feelings… and that was enough for Bobby and Josh, the managers, to keep me around. I … Continue reading Manners Matter. Rejection Stings. Silence Corrodes…
There’s this thing that happens when I’m playing Animal Crossing. I’m wandering around in my little pink dress and pink bear head, watering flowers, chopping down trees, and checking on my neighbors. Katt has a cold, so I take her some medicine. They’re all thrilled to see me. They gush, they sparkle, they tell me … Continue reading Masking Monday: Demented and Sad, but Social
I love horror movies. I mean, not every horror movie. Some of them are just… well, horrible. Yes, that pun was intended. No, I’m not even a little bit sorry. Because we’re about to enter the land that many choose to actively avoid—the land of horror movies. Not gonna lie: as I typed that last … Continue reading the horrors…
Thyroid meds, dread, hope, and lotion on the skin. I am fragile like a bomb… carving out space for joy while my body recalibrates.
A couple of weeks ago, my very first Dear Cami advice column went out into the world through Gal Pal’s Museletter. I’ve always wanted to write an advice column. Seeing it out there was joy spiked with fear—my favorite combination. I wanted to share it here too... This space has always been where I lay … Continue reading This month’s letter comes from She Who Does Not Comply…
Back in 2017, we were in the path of a near-total eclipse. 99.7% totality. So close to the real thing it almost counted. I’d never experienced anything like it, and to say I was excited is an understatement. All morning I was giddy. I’d do a little work, then bolt outside to check the shadows, … Continue reading Masking Monday: 99.7% Eclipse, 100% Me…
I took the nameless Labubu down into the office to co-work with Tam and me. First-time visitor. He was unimpressed by the desk setup but immediately glued himself to the big screen where Animal Crossing was running. Watching tiny digital villagers fish and sweep their little islands seemed to delight him. Or maybe he was … Continue reading Creature Report: Entry 007 — Fortified
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