I always thought part of my struggle as a human was that I'm not terribly malleable. Imagine my surprise when — after years of therapy — I had the realization that I've been too fucking malleable. Too willing to change and reshape myself. Repackage myself. Let my opinions be known… but not if they're hurtful. … Continue reading one star only…
About a month ago, shortly before last Friday the 13th, I decided I should do something intentionally nice for myself every single day. I didn't think it would be easy but I genuinely didn't think it would be hard. Some days were easy. I ordered a coffee mug from a ceramic artist who I know from … Continue reading friday the thirteenths, part two of three…
That whole emotional tarot post, the one about popcorn bowls and tarot decks and saving things for company that isn't coming — came out of a project I'm working on. I've been handling all the decks regularly and it's made me incredibly reflective. And I'm in a making mode right now — trying to keep … Continue reading the Bilbo moment…
I remember the first time I ever saw a deck of tarot cards. I was a teenager standing in the back corner of Vacaville’s Lesbian Bookstore. Next to a case full of silver pendants with all sorts of mystic meanings, leather-bound journals that looked primed to receive and contain life-giving knowledge, and a rack of … Continue reading saving things…
I’m on a second day of full rest. Which sounds dramatic. But it’s because I left my house on Monday. This isn’t a story about a bad driver.Or a death threat.Or even the adrenaline crash that followed. Though it does contains all of those things. It’s about what happens after the body decides it was … Continue reading contact not required…
Night andI can only imagine unhinging my jawto open my mouthwideenough to devour the worldbut I'd prefer the ice cream. CK
On the Venn diagram where multi-letter diagnoses, neurotype, and lived experience overlap, there’s this very specific little pocket of my brain that desperately wants to move the furniture. I don’t know what it is about it… Maybe it’s a bit like playing dollhouse. Except now I get to play dollhouse the way I want to. … Continue reading midnight musical chairs…
At the end of this year I had to give up dairy. Some of you are thinking, oh how unfortunate. Some of you are thinking, shut up and get over it. Some of you maybe don’t actually have emotional attachments to food and might not understand why I’m talking about that at all. October 31st … Continue reading i give up…
There’s a space between underdoing it and overdoing it that other people call Tuesday. I seem to have misplaced mine. It feels ridiculous to me that I, an intelligent 48-year-old woman, still don’t have the sense to stop and rest when I need to. I haven’t ever really known how to. Not consistently. But it’s … Continue reading finding Tuesday…
I've always had itchy skin. Sensitive skin. Problem skin. Whatever polite term the adults around me used, the reality was simple: I reacted to everything. Dryer sheets. Scented detergent. Some makeup made my eyes puff up. Perfumes that smelled terrible and made my arms and neck itch. The solution was also simple. Just avoid ever … Continue reading Was it Strawberries or Was it Stress?
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